Post by Ater Nox on Jul 28, 2017 21:24:47 GMT -5
Earlier today, I was informed by the Council of Nine that an investigation has been official launched into Taco Island and its Mayor. Apparently there have been reports that I may have committed some light treason, tax fraud, blackmail, bribery, art forgery, blasphemous libel, regular libel, disturbing the peace, poaching, criminal rock throwing, wilful fire-raising, defamation, disposal of a corpse with intent to obstruct or prevent a coroner's inquest, embezzlement, employment fraud, jury tampering, public endangerment, hair theft, hot prowl burglary, impersonation of a barista, jaywalking, loitering, mutiny, official misconduct, racketeering, obstruction of justice, obtaining a money transfer by deception, possession of stolen goods, obtaining pecuniary advantage by deception, public nuisance, perverting the course of justice, outraging public decency, perjury, witness tampering, reckless burning, refusal to serve in a public office, sabotage, usury, soliciting to murder, sedition, trespassing, vandalism, war profiteer and conspiracy to commit all of the above.
In completely unrelated news, I am travelling to some important business meetings with the world's best taco forgers in a number of non-extradition tax havens for *cough* research into *cough* how to *ahem* better serve Taco Island. Unfortunately, that means I won't be able to be interrogated in any official hearings.
Citizens of Taco Island, in my absence please remember you didn't see anything, you don't know what anyone is talking about and don't accidentally sign up to be a witness for the prosecution.
In completely unrelated news, I am travelling to some important business meetings with the world's best taco forgers in a number of non-extradition tax havens for *cough* research into *cough* how to *ahem* better serve Taco Island. Unfortunately, that means I won't be able to be interrogated in any official hearings.
Citizens of Taco Island, in my absence please remember you didn't see anything, you don't know what anyone is talking about and don't accidentally sign up to be a witness for the prosecution.
